depresión desesperación I have been hurt
again
Saturday, June 27, 2009, 8:46 pm
Fear

Fear, why do humans experience fear? When we are facing darkness, loneliness, loss, hurt or death, why would we be afraid? Fearful experiences have finally let me understand that humans become weak at that moment because we do not know how to face the unknown. Thus, if we ignore those unknown, or even try to befriend fear, perhaps fear would turn from pain to joy and excitement! However, sometimes, these joy and excitement will bring about greater fear. The, we would need more energy, turning these fear into even greater and captivating ecstasy.



Friday, June 19, 2009, 8:23 pm
That toilet.

The floor was wet, with darkly-coloured puddles everywhere. The light flickered, so that there were times when nothing could be seen. The seat was yellow, with moss-covered cracks and water all over it. On the inside, brown globs dotted the sides, accompanied by the occasional dried tissue paper. The drain beside the toilet bowl was supposed to be white, but all I saw was yellow thickly covered by black wet dirt around it. The tap wasn't working properly; sometimes brownish water dripped out before the flow of clear water ran, if it was clear. Brown unidentified marks and white goo which I can only presume is dried toothpaste stained the basin. The colour of the walls was new to me. Was it grey? Was it green? Was it brown? I couldn't tell.

But one thing's for sure. I'm never going there again.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009, 11:51 pm

Another day has gone. But what have I acheived? Nothing. Just more feelings of emptiness.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009, 7:42 pm
Sick.

I'm sick. Been sick for a week. But don't worry. I didn't get a fever so I don't have H1N1. Just that it sucks. Running nose plus a cough. Lucky the doctor's medicine works very well. Much better now. But the medical fees were very high. $77. Whoa. And more than 8 types of medicine. I don't know... it's so expensive. And whenever I keep coughing and continually blow my nose for the whole day, mummy will only say, “你一天用一盒纸巾,不觉得太过分了吗?”

7:41 pm

好希望有一个知心的朋友哦。有时感到太寂寞了。真正能敞开心胸,没有任何秘密的朋友已经不再我的身边了。

为什么我永远只是一个人?


Saturday, June 06, 2009, 10:35 pm

从年头等到现在,好不容易有时间想要再看一下,却让他给弄不见。

没有鼓励我,或承认我的努力,只会不停的嫌弃我,对她而言,我比一般人努力,是让她看到成绩册,成绩好不好都不当一回事吗?

偶尔要的东西,想了很久的东西,明明有,明明不是我的错,却不知道怎么的,莫名其妙成了自作自受。

原来,我是那么地悲哀。

为什么很穷的孩子,吃别人的剩饭剩菜,却能笑得那么开心?